Chuckle Brothers to Lead Brexit Negotiations
The EU won't be laughing at Barry and Paul when negotiations start

They’ve found their way into stately homes whilst carrying a giant ladder; they’ve managed to climb up a tree dressed as a pantomime horse; and they’ve even managed to escape any celebrity sex scandals. But now it’s ‘To E-You; to me’, as the Chuckle Brothers are appointed lead negotiators for Brexit.

It’s believed that brothers Barry and Paul have been top of Theresa May’s negotiator wish list since she entered Downing Street as Prime Minister. A source close to Mrs May said ‘Theresa really respects Barry and Paul for their ingenuity in getting out of a scrape’, he said, ‘and that type of quick thinking is going to be what we need when we negotiate with the EU’. ‘She believes that their quick-paced banter and slap-stick antics will have them running rings around Jean-Claude Juncker and his cronies’.

But just like Brexit, there are big losers as well as small ones. With their new responsibilities it’s unlikely they will be able to commit to their more serious theatre work. Trey DeBords, the manager at the Nottingham Theatre Royal said that it looks ‘increasingly unlikely’ that they will be appearing in this year’s panto, Jack and the Beanstalk. ‘I spoke to them last week and they managed to persuade me to tear up their contract, pay their legal fees, give them a cut of the merchandising and take my wife out to dinner – which I’ve got to pay for’, explained DeBords.